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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29627298">A Place to Live</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zapenstap/pseuds/Zapenstap'>Zapenstap</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Gundam Wing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon, F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:40:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,788</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29627298</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zapenstap/pseuds/Zapenstap</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Years after the war is over, Duo gets a surprise call from Heero and a cryptic request. On route to the Colonies, Vice Foreign Minister Relena Darlian is preoccupied by her confusing relationship with Heero when her plans are interrupted.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Relena Peacecraft &amp; Heero Yuy, Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Church of Lemons 2021</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A/N: There’s a Gundam Wing revival happening! 2020 was the 25th anniversary (1995 for Japan). You can also watch it on Hulu now, subbed and dubbed. I got roped into the 2021 Church of Lemons (COL) by The Black Rose, though this fic is technically a lime. I think I always tell the same story about Heero and Relena—a story about how they get over themselves and get together—but I hope you enjoy it anyway. </p><p>Cheers.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Space Colonies were conceived as perfect worlds.</p><p>Architected by engineers and made habitable by scientists, on the Colonies, there were no natural disasters. Weather was controlled. Every building, park, and tree was carefully plotted by human hands.</p><p>Each was designed to be a perfect paradise.</p><p>And maybe they were, or had been, until the wars.</p><p>In After Colony 201, Duo preferred the junk heap. Years had passed since the Earth and the Colonies mutually disarmed, abandoning decades of fighting, assassination, and bids for power between new-world revolutionaries and old-world aristocrats with stakes in traditional forms of rule. Society had largely embraced Relena Darlian’s progressive and idealistic approach to government. Life was peaceful.</p><p>But it wasn’t perfect.</p><p>Duo sat at his desk punching waste diversion numbers into a database and tallying up government credits. The desk was made from of an old door welded to upturned pipes and shoved into the back of an old trailer he had converted into an office. There was a small scrap of Gundanium Alloy holding down a stack of bills. It made him smile to use it as a paperweight.</p><p>All in all, his life wasn’t too bad considering everything that had gone into shaping it, but he did wonder sometimes if he had too many dark thoughts and not enough people to share them with.</p><p>The corner monitor in his office showed a live feed of the Preventers communication channel. He checked the logs regularly, keeping an eye out for open requests for information, support, or supplies, but he rarely got asked for anything anymore. There were younger men than he available now, and more eager. He had earned an early retirement… if he wanted it.</p><p>That was why it surprised him when a blip appeared at the bottom of the screen.</p><p>He had an incoming call.</p><p>Duo picked up the comm-link and put it in his ear.</p><p>“H… Hello?”</p><p>“Duo? It’s Heero.”</p><p>Duo recognized the voice. But it had been years since he had heard it.</p><p>“H…Heero,” he sputtered. “Hey. Um, I didn’t… How long has it been? What’s going on?”</p><p>Chewing his lip, Duo scanned through the day’s Preventers feed, searching for some urgent notification of impending catastrophe or violence that he would expect to accompany a direct call from the elusive ex-Gundam Pilot Heero Yuy.</p><p>There was nothing.</p><p>“You sound stressed,” Heero said. “Are you okay?”</p><p>Duo had to physically remove the comm link from his ear and stare at it from a meter away to make sure he had not just hallucinated. Heero did not inquire after people’s health, especially Duo’s, not that he could remember anyway.</p><p>“Hello?” Heero’s voice came clearly from the comm-link, tinny and small. “Duo?”</p><p>“I’m here,” Duo said, putting the piece back in his ear. “I’m good. I just… never mind. Is there…” He scrubbed a hand over the top of his head, unsure what words were going to come out of his mouth. “Is everything okay with… with you?”</p><p><em>Why</em> was Heero calling him? What intel did Heero have that the Preventers did not know? His heart was racing. He was starting to feel too old for this. He scanned the shelves surrounding his working desk, unconsciously looking for a drink. But he had thrown out all the bottles. He had promised Hilde and he meant to keep that promise. Duo bowed his head, squeezing his eyes shut. He had made that promise when he thought he would not be getting calls like this anymore.</p><p>“I need a favor,” Heero said.</p><p>“Yep,” Duo said quickly. What else was he going to say? He could say no to a lot of people. He did it to scrappers every day. He could break promises if he had to. But he couldn’t refuse the request of anyone he had fought alongside in the war. He took a deep, staggering breath. “What do you need? How can I help?”</p><p>“I just need the name of someone you killed.”</p><p>“Um… What?”</p><p>“Back in 195. Quatre said you had a catalogue.”</p><p>“You talked to Quatre?”</p><p>“Yes. Quatre said you had a catalogue, that you did this program where you made a list of everyone you had killed in the war.”</p><p>“I… right,” Duo said. He <em>had</em> done that, as part of his therapy to deal with the PTSD that had plagued him a few years after the war had ended. He didn’t remember telling Quatre about it, but he might have? It was during that period he couldn’t remember very well, when he drank more and remembered less of what he said and did to anyone. But that was behind him now.</p><p>“Do you still have it?” Heero said.</p><p>“Uh, yeah,” Duo said. “Yeah, I think so. I’ll have to look. You want a name?”</p><p>“It was a lieutenant stationed at the Lunar Base. There are logs he was killed by the Deathscythe. I assume that was you.”</p><p>“I remember that,” Duo said, but he was puzzled. “I can look, but… what is this about? Is there some sort of revenge plot afoot that I should know about? Am I in danger?”</p><p>“No,” Heero said. “No, nothing like that. I’m just tracking down some information. It’s nothing to worry about. It doesn’t involve you.”</p><p>Duo did not feel much better.  “Are you sure?” he said. “Is it something the Preventers should—”</p><p>“It’s a personal matter, Duo. There’s no threat.”</p><p>Duo was flummoxed. “Um. Yeah, I’m sorry. You’re going to have to give me a little more.”</p><p>There was a pause.</p><p>“I think we’re related.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“The lieutenant. I think he was a relative of mine.”</p><p>“Really? Jesus, Heero. I’m sorry. I had no idea.”</p><p>“Don’t apologize. I didn’t know him. I just need to confirm something.”</p><p>“I… Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I’ll see if I have it.”</p><p>“Thank you.” Heero’s voice was quiet. That was not unusual, but it was… softer than Duo remembered, less intense. Duo tried to remember if Heero had ever thanked him before.</p><p>“Are you sure you’re okay?” Duo said. “I appreciate the call, really. It’s been a long time. I’d like to help. But how are you doing? You aren’t planning some kind of ceremonious…” Duo chose his words carefully. “… justice tour?”</p><p>Trowa had told him that Heero had done that once. He’d gone to the Noventa family and asked them to avenge the death of their pacifist patriarch that Heero had mistakenly killed. Was this something like that? Duo couldn’t see quite how it fit, but Heero often did and said strange things. Not as strange as Wufei maybe, but still strange.</p><p>“You aren’t also giving away all of your possessions, are you?” Duo asked hesitantly, “or…”</p><p>“I’m not trying to kill myself,” Heero interrupted him. “I am just trying to get some documents together.”</p><p>“Documents?”</p><p>“I am trying to get identification.”</p><p>Duo could not keep the surprise from his voice. “An ID card? But you’ve never had one. You never <em>wanted</em> one. Why do you suddenly need…?” He trailed off, staring at the blinking lights of the console, thoroughly baffled. He could think of no reason that Heero would want ID suddenly. He was a ghost with an obviously fake name and making a good living in the private security sector by all reports. Didn’t it serve him best to <em>remain</em> untraceable?</p><p>“I need a valid ID to get married.” Heero’s voice was very cool, very level, very matter of fact.</p><p>Duo had to pull the comm-link out of his ear again. Several beats passed in deafening silence. Heero didn’t say anything, didn’t explain further. Duo didn’t say anything. He was trying to wrap his mind around what…. It couldn’t be… He didn’t mean…</p><p>Slowly, Duo put the comm-link back in his ear. He found that he was smiling. The anxious uncertainty he had been feeling had been replaced by a sudden surge of elation. “Say that again,” he said. “One more time. I didn’t quite hear you.”</p><p>“I need ID to marry Relena.”</p><p>“Relena? You’re… seeing Relena? Since when? I thought that ship had—”</p><p>“Are you going to help or not?”  Heero’s voice was now tinged slightly with annoyance. Duo found this oddly reassuring.</p><p>“I am absolutely going to help!” Duo assured him. “I am going to put down everything and help right away.” He was grinning. He could not stop. “Wow. That’s really great to hear, Heero. Honestly, I never thought you two… I mean, I didn’t know if you—” He winced, wondering if he had just ruined a joyous moment with doubts. “Sorry. That’s not what I mean. I’m happy for you.”</p><p>“It’s taken a long time.”</p><p>“So, you’re doing well then?” Duo said, eager suddenly for good news, to connect to other people again, to hear about what everyone had been doing. It had been so long. For a moment, he worried he was going to start crying. “I mean, you must be doing well if you’re doing this. It’s a big deal.”</p><p>“Please don’t say anything to anyone,” Heero said. “She doesn’t know yet.”</p><p>Duo’s stomach suddenly lurched.</p><p>“Wait,” Duo said. “Hang on. What you do you mean she doesn’t <em>know</em>? About the ID? You have <em>asked</em> her to marry you, right? She knows that much?”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>Duo was silent. “Okay, um. Okay. Does she know you’re <em>going</em> to ask?”</p><p>Heero was silent.</p><p>Dread started to overtake the joy Duo had been feeling moments before. “Heero, are you… You have been <em>seeing</em> her, right? I mean, the two of you are… You’re together? You’re a couple?” He scrubbed a hand through his hair. Why was <em>he</em> flustered? He wasn’t the one suddenly asking a girl he knew nearly ten years ago to marry him. “I honestly don’t know with you.”</p><p>“Just get me the name, will you?” Heero said.</p><p>And then he hung up.</p><p>Duo took the comm-link out of his ear again. He set it on top of the desk and stared at it blankly. </p><p>Heero and Relena. They were… They <em>had </em>to be together given this news, right? Relena had never mentioned it in any press conferences though. The tabloids had published a couple pieces about Heero as a member of her security, speculating that he was Relena’s “special someone” but that had been years ago. The photos had shown them standing closely together, almost touching. But that could be because of Heero’s job. Everyone knew he had an invested interest in Relena remaining <em>alive</em>. But were they <em>together</em>? Duo felt relatively certain they had at least kissed before. He seemed to recall that they had even been photographed once with their lips almost touching, as if they had just… or were about to… unless Heero had just been whispering something to her?</p><p>For a time after the war, everyone had been sure that they would become a couple. But nothing had happened. Certainly, nothing had ever been announced. It didn’t seem in Relena’s character to be intimate with anyone on the sly, but then again, she was a human woman with needs, and people were sometimes surprising. It was just impossible to tell. They were both so <em>private</em>. Their history was so <em>complicated</em>. Plus, everything Relena did was scrutinized so heavily. And Heero was… Heero.</p><p>Duo scrubbed a hand over his head again.</p><p>If Heero was going about trying to track down information about his biological family just to get an official ID to <em>marry</em> Relena… Well, that <em>must</em> mean he loved her. And she had to know. Heero certainly wouldn’t ask Relena to marry him totally out of the blue. He wouldn’t do it just out of convenience for the job …</p><p>…would he?</p><p> </p><p>*****</p><p> </p><p>A text message beeped at Heero. He glanced at it.</p><p>It was from Duo.</p><p>Trant Clark.</p><p>Ah. <em>Trant</em>, not <em>Trent</em>. That explained it. Just a few more blanks to fill in.</p><p>Not that it was a complete mystery. Heero remembered the name he had been born with—the name his mother had given him. He had just never told anyone what it was. It didn’t seem to matter. The boy that had answered to that name had been someone else, someone he didn’t remember anymore, someone he could never be again. The heart of that boy had been crushed when his parents died, and again and again each time some other protector had been killed, and then again each time he had killed someone after that. That boy had vanished. He had been eaten away by grief and pain and the spiraling vortex of unrelenting regret.</p><p>Heero didn’t really remember his mother. He had impressions of her, and the man she had been married to, but they were vague feelings more than real memories. He thought he recalled her hands, delicate and soft and refined. He could identify the earliest impressions of his life with her as happy, a feeling of being safe and loved. That warmth and kindness had persisted in him somehow, deep down, even after he had lost his parents, his heart, his will to survive, everything.</p><p>It hurt to sit with that, but he accepted it. He was stronger now, more able to face realities that he had once been numb to. That was crucial because he needed to write down his birth name to request access to official documents. Trowa had explained the process to him. He had a birth certificate. To obtain it legally, he would need signed affidavits from relatives asserting his identity, and possibly a DNA test to confirm if there was anything from his mother on file, but he thought he could get that. It might mean having to meet people who had known him as a child, or had known his parents, or who were distantly related him.</p><p>But he could do that. He would do anything he had to. That was step one. He would officially become… someone. In step two, he would become who <em>she</em> needed him to be.</p><p>He paused with a pen poised over the boxes on the paper, and then hastily scrawled the name he had first learned to write. A few years ago, this would not have been possible for him. It would have filled him with pain, and so he would have avoided it, to the point that he wouldn’t even have remembered what had caused the dread. It was only in recent years that he had gotten better at processing his emotions rather than just acting on them, at naming them, feeling them, and accepting them in a way that did not cause him to disassociate.</p><p>He finished the form.</p><p>It was just a document. What mattered was that, through this process, he could become Heero – officially. It didn’t matter that the name had been a code name during a time of his life that was traumatic, or that the name had once belonged to someone famous who was now dead.</p><p>It was the name <em>she</em> used. Relena. He didn’t want to be anyone else.</p><p>Briefly, he wondered if he was being overly simplistic. Duo had seemed agitated that Heero hadn’t discussed all of this at length with Relena already. But Heero wasn’t worried.</p><p>He knew his future. It had crystallized for him in a single life altering moment. He had seen Relena after a few weeks apart from her, after a Preventer mission that had come out of the blue. She had just been walking down the stairs of a government building, her hair catching the light of the sun, nothing special. But she had looked at him and smiled and he just… knew.</p><p>He had named the feeling. He had accepted it.</p><p>He loved her.</p><p>Relena was unmatched and unmatchable. He had missed her in those weeks, and he had never missed anyone before. The absence of her filled all the corners of his mind, haunting him at every thought, every turn. He knew then that he was unmistakably in love with her, that he would never feel about anyone else the way he felt about her. He did not want to be separated from her.</p><p>Many decisions came to him then in a gentle but inexorable cascade. Relena was the center. He would always circle back to her, <em>had</em> always circled back to her. She was home.</p><p><em>She</em> knew that… didn’t she?</p><p>Suddenly, he began to worry.</p><p> </p><p>*****</p><p> </p><p>“Flight attendants, please prepare the cabin for descent.”</p><p>Relena looked out the window of the space shuttle. The colony had looked far away only a few minutes ago, hanging in the depth of space like a silver ornament, a donut-shaped wheel fitted with a single overlong spoke. As the shuttle approached, the wheel expanded and the details crisped into a whole world. Bumps and grooves that had seemed like mere texture from space accelerated in definition, transforming into city blocks that stretched all the way around the inside loop. As the shuttle entered the atmosphere, gravity took hold and Relena’s view of the colony rotated. The closest buildings dropped below while the rest of the metropolis shrank and streamed away as part of a distant, dizzying sky.</p><p>The first time Relena had seen the Colonies, she had been a little girl squeezing her father’s hand, nearly jumping off her seat because she could not contain her excitement. The experience of entering the manufactured atmosphere of one of the Colonies for the first time had thrilled her undeveloped sensibilities. Everyone living on the Colonies had been so kind too. At that time, she had been reading the novella Le Petite Prince and believed that Space was filled with princes and princesses who lived among the stars. She had also believed her father was the kindest and noblest man in all the universe. The scent of his suit came back to her sometimes, especially when en route to the Colonies. Little moments like that still filled her with grief.</p><p>Relena turned her attention to the stack of papers on her lap. There was always a stack in her satchel—she insisted on printed copies for travel—and the stack was always changing. Her staff compiled it anew for her each day with tabs to separate the immediate from the urgent and the urgent from the non-urgent but still important.</p><p>Today’s stack included only a few items in the immediate category.</p><p>That was peculiar given that the press currently hated her.</p><p>There had been a recent explosion in association with the Mars Terraforming Project. Over a dozen people had died. Analysis from engineers on the ground—and confirmed by her brother—determined the incident to be accidental, the result of an unforeseen mechanical failure, but sensational rumors of terrorist bombings had filled all the news channels. Relena had little knowledge and no oversight of engineering mechanics, but because she was the leading champion for terraforming Mars, she had been receiving a nonstop stream of correspondence from a host of dignitaries regarding legal challenges for remuneration from the families of the dead and injured and – as always – a load of hate mail.   </p><p>The urgent and immediate stack <em>ought</em> to have been higher.</p><p>But there was a note pinned to the top, scrawled in a hand she recognized.</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>These are the only ones worth your time.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>-H</em>
</p><p>Relena fingered the note.</p><p>She didn’t know how Heero <em>did</em> this. When did he have the time to read through her correspondence? She hadn’t seen or heard from him in days. Even when he was on her personal security detail, she didn’t always see him. When he wasn’t, their mutually busy schedules pushed them into opposite orbits.</p><p>Was he coordinating with her staff? It had to be that. They knew him, of course. He was the pilot who had saved Earth. They at least suspected the nature of Relena’s relationship with Heero, though she was careful to provide no proof. Still, she had seen them give each other knowing glances when his name was mentioned, especially if he left her a note or if he was assigned to guard her at her hotel. Oh, they at least suspected.</p><p>So far, even though it had been going on almost two years now, no one had come right out and <em>asked</em> her. Relena wasn’t sure if she should find this insulting but she was grateful in a way because she did not know what she would have said!</p><p>Was Heero her lover? Yes, certainly. But was he her <em>boyfriend</em>? Something less? Something more?</p><p>She read through the immediate correspondence, which contained one piece of hate mail that Heero had presumably thought she still ought to read. She read it, wincing at every word, but agreed with his assessment by the time she finished it. Although it hurt to read harsh words from strangers that brutalized her as if she wasn’t even a person, it was important to stay in touch with public opinion.</p><p>There were thousands of similar letters that she never saw, that provided no constructive criticism or not enough to be worth the distress they caused her. Heero didn’t let her read nonsense if he could help it. But occasionally she would get one like this, where someone was furious—rightly or wrongly—but with grievances that could, with diplomacy, be responded to and possibly addressed.</p><p>Having read the letter, Relena set it aside. She would dictate a response through her staff later. She read all the other pieces in the immediate stack and then in the urgent stack before at last reaching the final tab of non-urgent, but still important, correspondence.</p><p>At the bottom was a Christmas card from Quatre.</p><p>Relena stared at it in surprise. Her staff sent out Christmas cards for her every year. She tried to remember if any of Heero’s old war acquaintances were on that list. She didn’t think she even had updated addresses for most of them. She did occasionally hear from Quatre, whose wealthy family was influential on Earth as well as space, but did not typically receive a Christmas card from him.</p><p>She opened the envelop and flipped open the card.  The note was handwritten.</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, Relena!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You might be surprised to receive a letter for me, but don’t you think we should all keep in touch more? I have been busy, of course, but doing well overall. Have you heard the news about Dorothy? She is expecting again—baby number six! I see her and her husband whenever I visit Vienna. Six children and four dogs! Can you imagine? Their home is lovely. You should come some holiday. I know you are busy, but she said she would love to have you. Do you know what Heero is up to? I know he works with your security team. He contacted me not too long ago but was cryptic about what he wanted. For some reason, I thought you might know. You know I just get these feelings sometimes. I hope you are well!</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>-Quatre W.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Relena read the card again. Did she know what Heero was <em>up</em> to? What did <em>that</em> mean? Did Quatre… Did Quatre <em>know</em> about her and Heero? Was he somehow implying that he had—through some mysterious means—sensed that she and Heero had become her lover? Had Heero somehow dropped <em>hints</em> of their relationship?</p><p>It was a muddle she could not sort out. Heero was so private. And he had been so uncertain about everything to do with her at first that she had not pushed him for any kind of disclosure of what she meant to him. She had certainly not asked him to declare his feelings publicly. At first, after the war ended, she had just wanted to <em>see</em> him. And that had gone on… and on.</p><p>Why would Heero even contact Quatre? He didn’t seem that interested in keeping up with the comrades he had fought alongside unless there was some Preventer-coordinated mission that required it. And those had come less often as there were younger Preventers that were more likely to be utilized these days—trained and managed by Sally Po and Wufei Chang.</p><p>More importantly, what had Heero said that made Quatre think that Relena knew what he was up to?</p><p>“I don’t know,” she muttered at the card, frustrated. “He doesn’t tell me anything either!”</p><p>It really was ridiculous.</p><p>She and Heero had a…complicated history.</p><p>When the war ended, he had been her friend. That much was true for certain. For a couple of years, he never missed her birthday, and gradually she started seeing him more. But she worried it was because she had begged to see him more.</p><p>Then, one night, he had kissed her. She had been surprised, but eager. Too eager maybe. Kissing became something they did. And then kissing had progressed to… She blushed to think about it, how she had behaved back then, and without any assurances at all! Heero had seemed even more startled by her enthusiasm. After they had slept together a few times, each time almost accidentally, she thought that Heero would ask her to be his girlfriend… But he didn’t.</p><p>Instead, one black night on Earth when there was no moon and the stars were covered by clouds, Heero came late to see her. She reached out to caress his face, to kiss him, but he had stopped her hand. He told Relena that he cared about her, but that if he wasn’t serious about her, he should not send her mixed signals.</p><p>She took that to mean he was not serious about her.</p><p>The cratering feeling in her chest could not be expressed by words. She did not cry. She just stared at him numbly, uncomprehendingly, and then the part of her that was a diplomat took over, determined to be understanding, deescalating, and polite. She told him she respected his feelings and his frankness, but that he must go, as she had work to do.</p><p>They stopped sleeping together. For the better part of a year, she did not see Heero at all.  That had been an awful time for her, filled with conflicting emotions that left her feeling wrung out night after night so that she could barely shuffle through the days. But eventually things calmed down. She let her staff know that she wanted to see Heero again, that she needed him at least in a professional capacity. And so he came. She had missed him so much. The instant she laid eyes on him again, she forgave him. She couldn’t help it. They became friends again.</p><p>Another year passed and Relena found herself in the crosshairs of a political scandal that had nothing to do with her. Heero had been on her security detail per usual. A day overflowing with frustrations had ended with her in tears. She had talked to Heero about her day, as was common since he was familiar with the people she interacted with and the scandal in general. He often gave good counsel, always practical and reassuring. That night, he had said some things that were particularly comforting. Some of them were flattering to her specifically. She had stopped crying and somehow—she could not remember exactly how—they had started kissing.</p><p>No, she <em>could</em> remember. She had grabbed his hand, seeking reassurance. He had taken it, but then his thumb had caressed the center of her palm. That was <em>not</em> something you did when your relationship was <em>all business</em>. She had looked at him, right into his eyes, and… </p><p>They had been on the couch. She remembered that. She had been drinking a glass of wine, but only half a glass. It was enough. Once she started, she could not stop. And he was kissing her too, his hands tangled in her hair, increasingly insistent. The meeting of their lips and tongues and mingled breath after so many months of longing made her insides turn to liquid heat. She ended up on her back with him on top of her, their arms and legs entangled. What followed was a mad, almost frenzied giving in to the urgency to explore each other physically again, as if he had not broken her heart and no time had passed at all.</p><p>With more than half her clothes removed and her hair disheveled, Heero had pulled back enough to ask her throatily if she wanted to move to the bedroom. He was also half undressed, but what she remembered was his ocean blue eyes, dilated and sensual, his voice unusually husky, the breath ragged between words…</p><p>She agreed. </p><p>The walk to the bedroom was awkward. Heero had already pulled off her skirt and unbuttoned her blouse. Her bra was hanging around her waist. It was far too late to feel modest or embarrassed. His hands were on her hips. She was in a hazy frame of mind, but she remembered taking his hand, not the other way around, and leading him into the bedroom. Beside the bed, they peeled off the remainder of each other’s clothes. Heero’s body had felt hot and glorious against her skin. He kissed her collarbone. She recalled that because he hadn’t done it before that night, or not in that way. His touches were tender and intimate in a way that felt new. And then he laid her on the mattress. He was so very gentle, so careful…</p><p>In the morning, with sunlight creeping through slits in the blinds, she had turned to see Heero asleep on his stomach beside her. She remembered watching his face and just thinking… how precious.</p><p>Of course, she had to get up and get dressed and go immediately to meetings. She tried not to think about what she and he were, about what it all meant. She was distracted, though, and that was nice. The frustrations from the day before just did not seem to stick.</p><p>That first night was followed by more like it, but haltingly and a bit confusingly. She didn’t know what they were doing and didn’t know how to ask. Was he still not serious about her? Was this just a physical release? There wasn’t a lot of time to confer. She had never been so busy, to the point that she never knew when she was going to see Heero, if he would come by her rooms or not, if they were… or weren’t….</p><p>That went on for a while.</p><p>And then one day, after months of rendezvous that were sweet in the moment and agonizing in the days of silence in between, Heero disappeared again. He did not say why. Nearly a month passed before she saw him. It had been a good day at work for her. She caught sight of Heero at the bottom of the steps as she emerged from the building just after new legislation had been signed. He was waiting there as if he hadn’t ever gone away. Her heart leaped when she saw him—like it always did. She smiled.</p><p>But she was frightened too. <em>Why</em> had he disappeared? <em>Where</em> had he gone? Had they gotten too close? Was he just on a mission? If he had been on a mission, was it dangerous? He never said. She didn’t know how to bring it up without asking him point blank what she was to him. But she was afraid to do that because of what had happened before. So, she delayed, and then, bizarrely, there seemed no need to discuss it. His presence became constant. They connected at least once a week like clockwork. He left her notes. He got familiar with her staff.</p><p>It was driving her mad.</p><p>What <em>were</em> they to each other? More specifically, what was <em>she</em> to him? It felt like a relationship, but was it? She felt that <em>her</em> desires, at least, had always been clear. On more than one occasion she almost told him she loved him, that she had always loved him and wanted to make their situation official, but she held the words back. She remembered when he had disappeared. It happened after a particularly passionate night, one that left them both sweating and shaking and when he had mumbled something in her ear… She did not know what. It could have been “I love you.” It could have been something else.</p><p>She was terrified he would disappear again—and not come back. So, she said nothing, even though she knew that eventually… eventually…</p><p>It <em>couldn’t</em> go on like this. She <em>had</em> to ask. But what if she lost him?</p><p>The descent onto the runway was smooth and seamless. The shuttle barely bumped when the wheels touched the ground.</p><p>“Please remain seated until the shuttle comes to a complete stop.”</p><p>Relena found herself lost in reverie, torn by indecision, the stack of papers forgotten on her lap, her hands gripping the ends of the armrest as she thought how much she wanted to see Heero, and how frightened she was to ask him to define their relationship, to give her some sense of security in his feelings and intentions, and how silly she was to have let it go on so long in uncertainty.  </p><p>“I can wait,” she muttered to herself. “I am happy, aren’t I? Why disturb things? I don’t need anything more from him. I don’t need anything he doesn’t want to give.” She said this to herself, repeating it like a mantra. It was true, but also a lie. She didn’t <em>need</em> more. But she <em>wanted</em> more. And, if she was honest, she felt she deserved… and could rightfully expect…</p><p>“Vice Foreign Minister?”</p><p>Relena blinked up at the man in a suit and sunglasses who was suddenly standing beside her chair in the narrow aisleway. It was not Heero. It was one of her regular security officers.</p><p>“Is there a problem?” she asked.</p><p>“We need to get you off this shuttle immediately,” he told her. “We’ve received a tip that there might be an attempt on your life.”</p><p>Relena stared at him. This sort of thing had happened before, but not for an awfully long time. “I… right,” she said. “Of course. Will you… will someone inform Heero?”</p><p>The request dropped from her mouth before she had time to think about it. Normally, Heero was already <em>with</em> her when something like this happened. Usually, he showed up before she even knew she was in danger. What did it mean that he was not here?</p><p>She got up from her seat, still processing her thoughts. Instead of leading Relena toward the exit by the head of the plane, her security officer led her further down the plane to the emergency exit. Another one of her security team was waiting for her there and guided her down the stairs and onto the tarmac, where a car was waiting to receive her. Her competent team loaded her into the car and soon they were pulling away.</p><p>On the way from the spaceport, she was informed that her lodgings had been changed last minute to provide an additional layer of protection and that the meetings she had flown here to attend tomorrow were cancelled until the threat could be sorted and a new, safe location secured. Instead of a hotel downtown in the thick of the city, Relena was driven to a walled and gated community at the edge of the colony. The rest of her security team was waiting for her there.</p><p>“Am I just supposed to wait here then?” she asked. “Do you know how long it will be?”</p><p>The members of her security team glanced at each other, as if unsure how to respond. Relena found this curious, but the leading officer cut in. “We’ll let you know when matters are rescheduled.”</p><p>She nodded. They handed her the keycard to the house that she would be using for at least the next night. It was a gorgeous little cottage that looked snug and safe and pleasantly distant from crowds. It was exactly what she needed.</p><p>“Thank you,” she said again, and turned to walk up the steps. At the last moment, she paused and turned. “Oh, wait,” she said. “I asked you to contact Heero. You will let him know that it’s unnecessary for him to come? If everything is okay, I mean?”</p><p>Again, her security team glanced at each other.</p><p>“We’ll update him,” the officer assured her. “Have a good night, Vice Foreign Minister.”</p><p>Nodding, Relena unlocked the door and walked into the house. Closing the door behind her, she set her papers and purse on the small table in the hallway and hung her coat on the peg on the wall. Smoothing the wrinkles out of her A-line skirt, she took off her shoes, leaving them by the door, and walked around the corner and into the living room.</p><p>“Heero,” she gasped.</p><p>He was <em>there</em>, leaning against the back of a gray-blue couch. He wore a jacket over a dress shirt with a collar, as if he had expected to meet her in the city and accompany her to her meetings.</p><p>“How… How did you get my message so fast?”</p><p>“I knew you would be here,” he said, and gestured behind him. “Are you hungry?”</p><p>Relena looked passed him. There were lit candles on the table, the flames dancing softly. A charcuterie dinner of hard meats, cheeses, nuts, and olives was laid out beside a bottle of wine. “You did this?” she said, amazed.</p><p>“I didn’t know exactly when you would be in,” he said. Relena realized he meant the choice of meal. “So, I thought…”</p><p>Relena was speechless. She began to walk toward the table, as if to inspect the food, but as she came closer to Heero she suddenly did not feel hungry. She did not want to be anywhere except in his embrace. She made a sharp turn and folded herself into his arms. He caught her and pulled her close.</p><p>She held him tightly, her cheek flush against his shoulder, eyes closing as she breathed in the warmth and scent of him. She kissed the side of his face and then his neck. He stroked her hair.</p><p>How could she doubt what they had? Why did she always have so many questions and fears <em>only</em> when they were apart? Why couldn’t she just enjoy… whatever this was? When she was near him, all her doubts dissipated.</p><p>He pulled back slightly, just enough to tilt her chin so he could lean in and kiss her. His kiss was warm and comforting, yet somehow also deeply thrilling. She felt her body responding, her back arching, her senses opening fully to accept him. She let him kiss her deeply. His tongue opened her lips, questing for the inside of her mouth. She let him in. A tendril of heat coursed through her, arousing her. It was all she could do to kiss him back but only enough to close the kiss, like a quotation ending a sentence. Body thrumming, she forced herself to pull back. She put a hand on his chest to stop him advancing.</p><p>“I… Before we…” She closed her eyes. “Heero, I want to ask you something.”</p><p>She was trembling.</p><p>“Ask.”</p><p>The heat in her body shifted to embarrassment. If she was wrong… If she was wrong…</p><p>“Heero… Do… Do you… What are we?”</p><p>“What do you mean?” He touched her cheek. She flushed.</p><p>She dropped her eyes. She was trembling. What would she do if he said no? “Do you love me?”</p><p>His answer was swift and immediate. “Yes.”</p><p>A jolt went through her. There was <em>no</em> hesitation. Her head snapped up. Unbidden, tears came to her eyes. She stared at Heero through a shimmering veil, waves of unadulterated feelings of affection crashing over her. Never had she been so certain of anything. “Oh,” she said. “Heero… I love you too.”</p><p>“I know.” His voice was soft. His thumb brushed across her cheekbone, fingers threading into her hair. He leaned forward to kiss her again. She pulled back again.</p><p>“How long?” she demanded. “How long have you loved me?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” he said. “A long time.”</p><p>“Guess.”</p><p>He seemed confused by the sharpness of her voice, the rigid posture, the flash of anger. “Years.”</p><p>“Why didn’t you tell me?”</p><p>“I thought you knew.”</p><p>How was she to answer that? How was she supposed to just <em>know</em>? Did he think she could read his mind? Or… Well, maybe his actions were clear, looking at it from his perspective. He had come back after saying he wouldn’t send her mixed signals if he wasn’t serious. So, did that mean he had been serious <em>this whole time</em>, since that night on the couch? If so, why hadn’t he made it clear? But then, had she ever <em>really</em> doubted, really and truly…? It was hard to answer. Heero was so…</p><p>“Does that mean you want to be my boyfriend?” she blurted.</p><p>He blinked at her. “Aren’t I?”</p><p>She stared at him. “Are you?”</p><p>“I thought so.”</p><p>“Heero I mean publicly. Like, everyone knows and…”</p><p>“Yes, of course.”</p><p>She was floored. Had he been waiting for <em>her</em> to ask…? Maybe he thought, because of her career, the way she was scrutinized, that she would want to keep their relationship incognito? Hadn’t she even said something like that before, as a kind of deflection? She was starting to feel dizzy. “Well, if you are my boyfriend, I’d like to see you more,” she said. “I know schedules can make it hard.” She paused. Schedules were impossible. She wasn’t sure it was practical to see each other more than once a week, which is what they had already been doing. But… “Should we live together?”</p><p>He took her hand in his. His thumb stroked the tops of her index and middle finger. “Where do you want to live?”</p><p>Relena opened her mouth. Then closed it.</p><p>This presented a problem. Relena really didn’t have a permanent home. She was nearly always traveling. The Peacecrafts had estates on Earth, but she almost never frequented them, to the point that in recent years they had been opened to tourists. The Darlians had residences on both Earth and Space, but they were not strictly <em>hers</em>. They would be poorly suited to Heero’s tastes anyway.</p><p>“I guess I don’t know,” she said helplessly. “Where would you want to live?”</p><p>“Wherever you are.”</p><p>Relena didn’t know what to say. He was really okay with this? He was… She had just had to <em>ask</em>?</p><p>“We can live anywhere,” Heero continued. “As long as it’s with you, in the peace that you built, I don’t care.”</p><p><em>Peace</em>, Relena thought. <em>A place to live.</em> That was what she had promised him. That was what they had all fought so hard for.</p><p>Thoroughly flummoxed, Relena could not speak for a full minute. She wanted to sit down. She eyed the bottle of wine. “Why didn’t you tell me you wanted things between us to progress?”</p><p>“I thought they were.”</p><p>“But you didn’t tell me! You never <em>talk</em> to me.”</p><p>He looked puzzled. “I don’t talk to you?”</p><p>“We go days without speaking.”</p><p>“I didn’t know you wanted to talk more,” he said. “You complain about having to do so much talking in your job.” He seemed genuinely confused. Relena had to concede, now that she thought about it, that seeing her nearly every week probably more than met Heero’s needs for social interaction. And, yes, she <em>had</em> complained to him more than once about how much talking her job involved. Upon reflection, it wasn’t really the lack of <em>talking</em>, but the uncertainty that bothered her. She liked their silences. She liked just… being with him.</p><p>“Never mind,” she said. “Forget I said that. I think… I think I just needed to know that you… That we…” She paused. “Heero, do you mean to tell me that we have been together… for years… exclusively?”</p><p>“There’s never been anyone other than you.”</p><p>“And you love me?” she asked him. “You’re sure?”</p><p>He nodded.</p><p>“I mean… you really love me?” she pressed.</p><p>“I love you, Relena.”</p><p>“We can tell everyone? My staff…” She paused. “Wait. Does my staff know we are together?” The way Heero looked at her so quizzically she just <em>knew</em>. She put a hand to her forehead. Of course, Heero had told <em>them</em> that he was her boyfriend, that he loved her, that— She paused. A whole world of possibilities suddenly opened to her. “We could visit friends together? My mother? My brother and Lucrezia and their children? Your old pilot comrades? Dorothy and her six kids?”</p><p>“Dorothy has six kids?” Heero seemed genuinely surprised.</p><p>Relena laughed helplessly. “I had no idea either. I just—"</p><p>“We can see whoever you want. I want to marry you, Relena.”</p><p>Her eyes popped open. Tears sprang to the corners. She trembled. “Oh.”</p><p>Heero’s thumb caressed her knuckles again. “I need to get some things sorted,” he said. His tone was serious, but his eyes were warm in the candlelight, like pooled ink on parchment. “I don’t have a legal identity. I’m still working on that, so this isn’t an official proposal. But something Duo said…” He shook his head. “I thought I had better make sure that was something you wanted first.”</p><p>It sure felt like an official proposal to Relena. He had just asked her to spend her life with him while holding her hand. What did he mean? That there wasn’t a ring? That he wasn’t kneeling? She didn’t care about that. She didn’t need a piece of paper to identify him either. “Yes,” she said. “Yes, I want to marry you.”</p><p>He looked relieved. Relena reached up and pulled him close, wrapping her arms around his neck. She kissed him. She tried to kiss him like she had never kissed him. His hands held her by the ribs, supporting her so she wouldn’t knock them both over. But his kisses were as vigorous as hers. His arms wrapped around her.</p><p>“God,” she whispered into his throat when he let her breathe. “I am so happy.”</p><p>His hands dropped to her waist. His fingers tapped her hips. He had done that before. She knew what it meant. She wanted it too. She was about to take his hand—</p><p>“Wait,” she gasped with sudden realization. “You said you <em>arranged</em> this? I don’t mean the food. I mean… Is there… Was there really a threat on my life?”</p><p>Heero smiled at her. And she knew then that there was not. There was no attempt on her life. He had called in the tip to clear her day. Or perhaps he just told her security detail to pretend…</p><p>Did <em>everyone</em> know that Relena was in a committed relationship with Heero <em>except</em> her? She didn’t care. She couldn’t feel anything other than pure joy.</p><p>She took Heero’s hand and pulled him toward the bedroom.</p><p>“You’re not hungry?” he asked her. A touch of amusement played around his mouth. “Thirsty?”</p><p>For answer, she turned abruptly and kissed him on the mouth. She made sure he understood.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Epilogue (Bonus Lemon)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It's a 1xR lemon</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A/N: It’s still 2/22 on the west coast and my pledge continues with a lemon. Plot What Plot (PWP) served straight up. Stop judging. You know you like it. Forgive errors. This was rapidly written, formatted and published.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Heero’s hands pulled the back of her body against his chest. Relena felt his lips on her neck, her shoulders... He swiped her hair aside and kissed a spot behind her ear, whispering as he did. </p><p>“The bed?”</p><p>She nodded, unspeaking. He had removed her coat. She hadn’t noticed it coming away, but it was on the floor. Heero’s shirt was the next to go. Her knees hit the mattress and he turned her around.</p><p>The flickering light of the candles threw shadows against the far wall of the bedroom, shadows that showed a shirtless Heero pulling Relena’s blouse over her head and dropping the garment on the floor. He brought her raised arms down around his neck in the next instant and kissed her.</p><p>Relena took his kiss in with her breath. His tongue sought immediate entry into her mouth. She allowed it exploration and fought for exploration in kind. Heero’s hands stroked her from her arms all the way down both sides of her body to her hips. Between his tongue in her mouth and his hands hot on the naked skin, she could barely think. </p><p>Heero was at her skirt now, but he didn’t reach for the side zipper. He hoisted it instead, bunching the material around her waist. </p><p>“Oh,” she gasped. “You’re not wasting time.”</p><p>“You seem to think I’ve wasted too much.”</p><p>She sucked in her breath as his fingers pushed the material of her underwear aside to feel how ready she was. He was not disappointed. His fingers played with her folds and then thrust upward in one smooth motion.</p><p>“I still can’t believe…” she gasped, tilting her head up to the ceiling. Heero did not stop. He kissed her neck as he moved two fingers up inside her, mimicking what was to come soon. “…that you didn’t tell me you loved me for years.”</p><p>"I thought I was showing you.”</p><p>He scooped her up then, lifting her easily, and deposited her on the crisply made bed. Relena registered a scarlet red coverlet with gold embroidered demasks but paid it no mind. She pulled herself up into a sitting position, scooted back a few inches, and then reclined against the pillows piled close to the headboard. Heero paused, leaning forward with his hands at the foot of the bed, examining her. She was bemused, and it must have shown on her face, because he smiled at her. Straightening, he began purposefully undoing the buckle of his pants.</p><p>Relena leaned back on the pillows. This room was unfamiliar, but as she lived out of hotels most of the year, the rooms where she made love with Heero were always unfamiliar. But he was not. She watched him frankly as he removed his pants. There was nothing awkward about the mechanics of undressing with Heero.  It wasn’t the number of times they had made love, which she could not count at this point. It had been the same the first time. She just liked to look at him. It didn’t matter what he was doing. She knew him so well that there was nothing that he could show her that would surprise or embarrass her, just as she could not surprise or embarrass herself. </p><p>Heero stripped down to black boxer briefs and climbed onto the bed next to her. His hands threaded through her hair and he turned her chin toward his face. He kissed her.</p><p>“You still should have said something,” she told him. “I was so… I was trying so hard not to scare you away.”</p><p>“You couldn’t scare me away,” he said. He kissed her again, sealing her response, and all her remaining thoughts scattered. His tongue dove into her mouth, playing with her tongue. She sank deeper into the pillow. One of his hands moved to her breast, shifting her bra to the side so he could massage her nipple. The sensation caused her to gasp into his mouth. Arching upward into his kisses, she reached behind her back to unsnap the clasp of her bra. Observing what she had done, Heero pulled the garment free from her body as soon as it came loose.</p><p>His hands roamed freely over her very naked, very pert breasts. He was looking at them with an expression that was difficult to describe, but it wasn’t lewd. She watched his face for a few moments, tender and intent, and then reached for him, half sitting up so she could rain kisses on his neck and shoulders. He sighed, his face lowering to her sternum. She ran one hand through his hair and gently down the side of his face. It was so important to her to show him that she loved him. Their eyes met as he lifted his head. She could drown in Heero’s eyes. Contemplation of that color blue—dark and deep as the ocean at twilight—had filled hours of her time. </p><p>Heero kissed her again, sweetly this time, without tongue. She kissed him back. And then he pinched her nipple, causing her to moan and thrust her tongue into his mouth again. He pulled his body on top of hers. Legs entangled, she felt how hard he was and purposefully shifted so that she could feel him between her legs. His head lowered. He caught her nipple in his mouth and suckled it lightly.</p><p>Relena rolled her eyes to the ceiling where shadows from the candleflames danced overhead. Heero’s mouth shifted to her other breast, leaving the first cold. His hands stroked down both sides of her body simultaneously in one delicious grope. She could still feel his hardness against her thigh, hot and straining against her. His eyes caught hers again in the low light of the candleflame, alight with intent. </p><p>“I’m sorry I didn’t say I love you sooner,” he said, his voice soft and serious, “but I’d like to be inside you now.”</p><p>How could she object to that?</p><p>She nodded. </p><p>Heero peeled away her underwear and his own without seeming to pause between. Relena could see him fully naked in the candlelight now. But he did not give her much time to take in the sight of him. He positioned himself between her legs and gently but determinedly thrust into her.</p><p>Relena made a little sound. He pulled back and thrust again, a little deeper the second time. She clung to his shoulders and encouraged him with soft, insistent sounds until he was all the way inside her. She reveled in the sensation but did not want him to stop. He also did not want to stop. He began to thrust in earnest, still holding himself slightly above her, his eyes on her face. </p><p>“That’s it,” she told him. “Right there.”</p><p>She could see the effect her words had on him in his eyes. The arousal was plain. His eyes were liquid, lost in sensation. He did not stop. His thrusts intensified. He lifted one of her legs for better access and she obliged, putting a foot against his shoulder so he could get deeper at an angle.</p><p>“God, Heero,” she gasped as he filled her. “This is…” She squeezed her eyes shut.</p><p>“I want you on top,” he said.</p><p>She was being shifted before she could think. On top, she had control. It lessened the sensation for him just a hair and the visuals were spectacular. She rode him sensuously, moving her hips in a wave-like pattern, first leaning in toward him and then away so that her golden-brown hair spilled over her shoulders and down her back. He reached up to feel her breasts and then lay back again, closing his eyes as the sensations he was feeling overpowered him briefly.</p><p>Relena was just starting to feel the simmer start to turn into a boil when Heero made a deep guttural sound of dissatisfaction and flipped her again onto her back. He pulled out of her briefly and got up on his knees. Then he lifted both her legs straight up and thrust into her again. He began to pound into her deeply and rhythmically.</p><p>It did the trick. “I’m close,” she gasped. “Heero, come closer.”</p><p>Heero opened her legs and leaned in close, his chest hovering just over hers. He did not stop thrusting. She grasped his shoulders, her whole body bouncing, as a tightening sensation seized her. She buried her face in his neck and cried out, first with nonsense, and then to tell him that she was coming. Heero’s thrusts became frenzied, and then he was also crying out into her neck.</p><p>As her orgasm burst upon her, Heero’s movements slackened and the full weight of his body crashed on top of her.</p><p>It was lovely when it happened simultaneously like that. They lay for a moment in happy silence, slightly sweaty but contented. After a few moments, Heero rolled off her, but only to reposition himself beside her. He pulled her back against his chest, his arms wrapping around her torso, and kissed her shoulder blade. </p><p>Relena did not ask if he was happy. She knew that he was. Every muscle in his body seemed relaxed as he molded to her. She intertwined her feet with his, wanting every inch of skin to touch. Heero would fall asleep soon, she knew. She wanted to ask one last thing.</p><p>“Heero,” she whispered.</p><p>“Hm?”</p><p>“Where did you go when you disappeared that one time—when you were gone for all those weeks?”</p><p>His arms tightened around her. “Mission,” he said. “Took me out of range for contact.”</p><p>“If you ever get called away like that again,” she whispered. “Will you tell me?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>Was it really that easy? She marveled, half wondering if she should be angry that he had withheld this happiness from her for so long. She felt sure she would not be able to sleep. She felt as if she might burst from joy. But then a thought came to her. What if she was the one who had not been clear? After all, just like him, she had not really said before now--</p><p>“Heero?”</p><p>“Hm?” Quieter this time. He was close to drifting off.</p><p>“Did you know that I loved you… all of this time?”</p><p>He stirred, seeming to wake up a bit. She felt his head rising. Propped up on one elbow, he looked down at her face. “I knew,” he said. “But it took a long time for me to believe.”</p><p>“Is that why you said you weren’t serious about me?” she asked, twisting slightly so that she could see his face.</p><p>His expression was hard to read, but he reached out and pushed a lock of hair away from her eyes. “I’ve always been serious,” he said. “But it took awhile to think that I—” He paused, searching for the right words. “I wasn’t ready at first. Back then, I mean. It just… I needed to think it through.”</p><p>“And when you thought it through,” she said, just as seriously. “Why didn’t you just come back and tell me?”</p><p>“I thought I made a mistake,” he said. “I thought I hurt you so much that you wouldn’t want me to come back.”</p><p>Her heart quickened. “No,” she said. “No, I was devastated. I missed you every day.” She reached out to touch his face. “But I am so glad you came back.”</p><p>“I am glad you called.”</p><p>She settled her head into the pillow. Heero settled back in beside her. She could feel his breath on her skin. She never wanted him to let go. And, she realized, he would not.</p><p>And so they slept, each curving into the other, letting the candles burn down into darkness.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A/N – A bonus lemon could go here.</p><p>Also, just FYI, I am writing a novel. It is set in America in the future. It is speculative fiction, not a romance, but has some elements 1xR fans may find appealing. If you are interested, leave a review or send me a note and I'll send you a link to sign-up for notifications.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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